Sunday, March 18, 2012

I am not ready to be a Dance Mom

We paid for Sary to take 10 classes in what was called "Story Ballet" which this school classifies as a "community outreach" class.  While in this class we also signed up for a performance which was advertised to the class participants and parents.  The performance package cost as much as the 10 lessons but what it  included was: 4 weeks of rehearsals, use of a costume, two tickets to the performance, a cast party, and a DVD.

It was kind of intense since Sarys regular class and rehearsals both fell on a Saturday.  For "Story Ballet" Sary could wear whatever she wanted and have her hair however she chose.  (I tried to keep it in a ponytail.) We did buy her proper ballet shoes for the class. 

For the performance rehearsals she was required: to attend ALL of the rehearsals, tights/leggings,  ballet dress, ballet socks, ballet shoes and "performance ready" hair.  Which was intimidating as Sary and I are lucky to get her hair brushed most days and performance perfect buns seemed out of the realm of possibility.  I asked a dancer we know at church for hair tips.

At some point when she was in full swing of this rehearsal schedule her Story Ballet teacher and I discussed putting her in "curriculum" classes possibly starting immediately with a transfer. This got me excited that she was performing well and learning.  It also made me a little nervous. Afer emailing repeatedly and calling the school during office hours the  assistant director in charge of admittance couldn't bother to return my phone calls or emails.

As the performance got closer I started to get  more irritated.  Is there just something in my past that makes me resistant to the conformity of a ballet conservatory. Or is it just natural to get irritated when an organization cannot get themselves organized enough to make it convenient for my friends and family to order tickets but have very high expectations of me and my four year old? She was expected to be on time for rehearsal though the teacher often made them wait to get started so she could walk her dog or make announcements to parents.  The announcements the week before the performance were as follows "I don't know how much the tickets are"  "I don't know when they will be available" "When I said pink tights in the class announcement I really meant peach."  Make sure the have performance perfect hair no matter how much gel and hairspray it takes." "Drop your kids off in tights and a hoody only"

We found out how much the tickets costs the Thursday before the performance on Sunday.  So much for inviting friends.  Not a good way to run a  fundraiser you would think they would want to sell out.

We arrived ten minutes before the drop off time which was "too early" "you must be new to the conservatory because ballet time is always at least ten minutes late".  The performance started ten minutes late.  The performance went okay.  But I think they would have done better if they had practiced they day before instead of trying costumes on the whole time. So after the performance we were not allowed to take pictures of the kids in their costumes after they left the stage and we were not allowed in the dressing rooms.  But Sary was not being let out of the dressing room because all she was wearing was tights and a hoody. ugh  When I tried to go in they said we have to do it this way we haven't lost a dancer yet.  But my 4 year old is in there frustrated because she cannot express that those are all the clothes she has because that is how the teacher told mommy to dress her for drop off.

When asked if she liked is she said "It was bored".  humph
So we went out to Red Robin and celebrated as a family Burkets enjoy celebrating life. 

Then on Friday at 7:30 pm we receive an invitation to the cast party 2:30 -4:00 on Sunday party dress required.  I was so done with the school at this point Jake says we have to go so we can get the DVD.  I asked Jake to take Sary to it.  But then Sunday Sary asks that I go with her because all the Mommies will be there. I get her dressed in her party dress and squeeze her feet into last years dress shoes.  We go we wait ten minutes and then it finally starts.  Then they play the 12 and 3 o'clock performances simultaneously on opposite sides of the room. The cake has egg and the drink is pink lemonade which Sary thinks is too sour even if it is pink.  She eats the oreos and rice krispie treat I packed in my purse with water.  We get our goody bag full of cheap pinata hard candy. Her performance teacher did not come to the party which clearly disappointed her. BTW DVD are not ready yet we will get an email at some future time and be told when we can pick it up. 

There is just some thing wrong with the messages they are sending these girls.  It is very important how you look.  But you do not have to respect others time.  You do not have to respect others feelings.  You are not responsible to make sure things are organized in such a way that it is easy for the people you are working with as long as they are easy for you. 

On my way out of the building I said a little silent good bye to the extremely impractical uncomfortable siezure inducing benches in the parents observation area.  I very patiently let Sary walk on the retaining wall even though she was in her party dress and I was anxious to get out of there.

I think we will stick with Petite Dance at day care this spring and find a new ballet school in the fall.  Petite Dance Ballet starts on Tuesday.  I am looking forward to dressing her in her pink t-shirt and ponytail.

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